What’s your life in your 20s?? Talking about mine, it was supposed to be happy, fun, and successful but I’m barely surviving a day hoping that tomorrow will be better than today.
In childhood, we dream big. We desperately wanted to become an adult but now after being an adult, we want to turn back time. Thinking about the good old days, it was a happier, fun, loving, stress-free kind of life, we just want to return to that comfort and bubble world. But, time stops for no one. Just like a snap of a finger, we have become an adult now but it still feels like we have yet to grow and see the world. Honestly, I still feel like I’m in my teenage era, from then I haven’t aged emotionally and mentally. Do you feel the same??
Sometimes I wonder if I’m going to remember my 20s when I’m in my 30s just like how I’m remembering my childhood right now and think that my 20s were a lot more better days than today. But, we have to live in the present right? Constantly, chasing the happiness of the past rather than actually living in the present is a huge cruse to your present self. Hence, sometimes I just feel, damn everything I’m going to live my life the way I want but life doesn’t go your way, it has its own plot going on.
Here I have divided section where I thought to share my experience of what I’m going through in my 20s.
Lots of Confusion
Life in your 20s is like 3 idiot’s song – ‘confusion hi confusion hai solution ka kuch pata nahi’(lot of confusion but solution is unknown). Like really, you don’t know what you are doing with your life, where are you going, and what you want to achieve. Especially for a girl like me who doesn’t have a big dream and just wants to live a normal life travelling, eating delicious food, reading books peacefully and comfortably in a small cozy house. Is it too much to ask??
The problem with me is I have a lot of hobbies. I want to do everything that interests me, that has created a problem in my career. In our generation,I think jack of all trades master of none is not applicable because every field wants the master and expert. That’s why I am struggling to find a job.
I changed my career field from a developer to a data analyst but I have yet to find a job, also currently in the process of taking an exam for Project Management. Recently, I am planning to do a small business in the future. There is a lot to do but also lots of confusion about how to do it and where to prioritize along with anxiety about failure.
Constant Pressure
I am an academically good student. I got good grades just like any eldest siblings in the family, “an overachiever” from childhood. As I am used to being at the top among others from the child, doing nothing progressive in my 20s has taken a toll on me. It feels like I have let down myself and the people around me.
Seeing my friends and colleagues getting ahead in their lives whereas I’m stuck at the same place exactly not knowing what to do with my life, feels frustrating, and sometimes jealous too. Like I know I’m talented but where this is taking me in life. That same talent is making me pressurized. Being good in studies feels like a curse now because my parents have great expectations from me, even I had such a great expectation from myself.
The constant pressure of not being able to do anything and being hard on yourself but also knowing that self love is the key, I am struggling to balance these things.
Burnout
You know, back then, when I was pursuing my Bachelor’s Degree, I was enthusiastic, cheerful, and positive even though there was still some confusion about what I wanted to do in my life. I wanted to join different clubs and get involved in different extracurricular activities, but things didn’t go the way I wanted.
COVID
COVID happened, and half of my college life went just like that by staying at home. The energy that was before COVID gradually became lower and lower, feeling uncertain and demotivated.
Though I again strive to move forward. I applied for a fellowship program conducted by WLIT(Women Leader in Technology). Fortunately, I was selected as one of the 15 candidates to be able to participate in the fellowship. I had great fun learning, gaining new technical and leadership skills, networking with like-minded people, and growing as a person. But, this energy didn’t last long.
Internship
I had to find an internship as a part of the fellowship program which was going nowhere. First of all, I hadn’t decided on my career path. Lots of options are sometimes a problem. I couldn’t decide but later I decided to be a developer, still it was quite hard getting an internship while you were still pursuing your studies. Finally, after a lot of struggle, I did get a remote internship along with my two fellows.
Honestly, I was excited and nervous working because I had been learning programming and doing a lot of projects to upgrade my skills. And, getting an internship felt like a huge opportunity. But, reality check.
The company where I worked was good but didn’t fit me. I was a learning aspirant who needed guidance and support that I felt I didn’t get while working. I was a wreck, demotivated again and satisfaction was far away. After this experience, I didn’t want to work as a developer, so trying a new field I decided on Data Analyst. But then again, I am having hard time trying to learn and have the same energy just like before. In the whole process, trying and hustling everyday just not to be left behind, had made me burnout.
Social Media
Nowadays, because of social media our attention span has become short. We want all the things at the speed of light. Back then we used to watch 2-3 hrs long of movies without getting bored. Now we can’t even watch 20 min of YouTube videos without getting bored or skipping every minute.
Social media, if it is utilized properly, can be great assets to your future but it can also lead you into depression and negativity. Since it is a platform of never-ending content, we are draining our energy and time, consuming that content. We lack focus, we don’t want to study, we don’t want to do our work, we procrastinate, and become lazy. This is a huge problem in our generation. I am no different than other.
But is it our fault that we are so hooked on social media apps that we know are harmful but can’t even leave them? It has become kind of a toxic relationship, like we know they are harmful yet we are addicted to it. I’m trying to balance social media consumption with real life. But still it’s a struggle.
Loneliness
After your teenage years, life becomes lonely. As you grow up, your friend’s circle becomes smaller, you get more busier, and you have more life problems that you didn’t ask for.
Since we nowadays tend to live more in the virtual world than the real world, we have less contact with humans and fewer real connections. Hence, loneliness is bound to happen, even if we are living with our family. It is also due to the fact that people nowadays are afraid of developing deep connection.
Even in a love relationship, people are becoming more selfish, dishonest, scared, fake, and irresponsible which has made love which is so valuable in life valueless. Rarely, do we find people that we connect on a deep level and have good intentions. It is a wish to have someone by your side no matter what when there is so much happening in your life. But can we find that person??
Responsibilities vs Yourself
One of the biggest challenges for people in their twenties is balancing personal dreams with family duties. Especially if you are the eldest in your family then it becomes even more difficult to choose your happiness over your responsibility. Family expectations and financial conditions make it difficult to focus on our happiness and growth.
When it comes to career and life choices, people in 20s feel torn. We want to follow our passions, which might be risky or unusual. But we also feel pressure to choose safer, more traditional paths that our families approve of. This inner conflict has caused stress, worry, and feelings of disappointment.
But the question is do we have to choose responsibility?? Will we ever be happy in our life choosing responsibility and not choosing our dreams?? Yes, there might be tight conditions where we with no doubt have to choose responsibility but in the long run is it worth it??
Conclusion
Feeling lost and confused, I am spending my 20s in the hope of better tomorrow. Everyone has gone through this phase but it feels like we are unlucky ones. People before us are already settled down and earning a good amount of money whereas people after us are involved in social media, influencers, and YouTube and are earning money online. People like us are stuck in between feeling confused as to which side to go.
What can we even do now? Keep the hope, do hard work, don’t give up, and live for yourself is the only thing that matters, making us looking forward to tomorrow.
If you are in you 20s, what are you facing right now?? Do share your experience and feel belong here on this blog.
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